he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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