he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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