Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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