I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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