i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Is it because I queefed?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
