i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
