You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
