Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize