i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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