Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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