What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
