we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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