I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
