she was so not down for the gang bang
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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