Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
