If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
