i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
ok first of all what the fuck
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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