im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize