I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
