I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
