Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
