North Korea, Best Korea!
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize