I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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