You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
