He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Randomize
