idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
