i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Randomize
