Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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