I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Randomize
