Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
