Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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