Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize