My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
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