yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
