Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
