did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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