Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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