even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
