I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize