you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
