Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize