I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
