Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
