My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
