Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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