Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize
