He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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