Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
