I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
