In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize