in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
